One New Year’s resolution that is easy to fulfill is to work on making new connections. It’s not just good for the soul, but good for the brain. Podcaster Nicholas Weiler interviewed neuroscientist Ben Rein about his book, Why Brains Need Friends: The Neuroscience of Social Connection. Their conversation covered how as a society, despite the great capacity and means of connection, we are more isolated than ever before. Technology, political, and social divisions can take part of the blame, but the biggest culprit is the choices we make to engage or not. One point Rein drove home: social isolation is terrible for our health and can be connected to the rising rates of mental illness, heart disease, and even dementia.
Many of us don’t think that deeply about it, but we know that when we connect on a meaningful level, it changes us for the good, but nothing good results from extreme isolation.
Innovative ways to connect, is the subject of this week’s Feel-Good Friday.
Janet Teal Minnig of Downey, CA, wanted to try a new restaurant in her neighborhood, but she didn’t want to do it alone. So, she threw out a post on her Facebook page asking if anyone wanted to join her. Minnig was pleasantly surprised that she got a response not just from one person, but several! And this wasn’t just a one off: Minnig continued to offer the opportunity for people to dine together, and from this, The Downey Supper Club was born.
A local woman didn’t want to go to a restaurant by herself, so she came up with an idea.
She started a club and invited strangers.
It has since grown into quite a large group that now meets regularly.
A unique dinner in Downey once a month is celebrating the power behind sharing a meal with others.
The Downey Supper Club meets once a month and is the brainchild of Janet Teal Minnig.
“It’s harder as you get older to make friends, and so I knew that this is the case for other people,” Minnig said.
Minnig came up with the idea over the summer after she wanted to check out a local restaurant but didn’t want to go alone.
So, she put out an open invite on Facebook.
“Does anybody want to go to dinner with me at the Sizzler for the grand opening? If you do join the Downey Supper Club,” she wrote on the post.
Surprisingly, people showed up, and the group has grown since then.
Read More: Feel-Good Friday: ‘Bridge Babes’ Teach Us to ‘Touch Grass,’ Connect to Nature—and Each Other
Feel-Good Friday: Institute for Learning in Retirement Gives More Shine to Seniors’ Golden Years
Not only has the group grown tremendously, but people from all over have reached out to Minnig asking how they can start supper clubs in their town or state. How cool is that! In a video posted on the Downey Supper Club’s Facebook page, Minnig offers some great tips on how to start and maintain the connection through food.
As someone who works from home and is also moving into my senior years, maintaining connections I already have, but also creating new connections is vital to my physical and mental health. But even in my small community, some of the women I know have lamented the difficulty in establishing regular interactions. Two of my friends got together and created the ingenious idea of a “Besties” group. They post events and invitations of all kinds, like getting together to work out at the gym, or for a fair or event in the area, or just getting together for dinner, and encourage other women to join in or to post their own.
It’s been over a year, and like the Downey Supper Club, this group has grown by leaps and bounds, and women have bonded in special ways, through a variety of means. Like Minnig, I love connecting over food; so, the times I have most enjoyed with the Besties group are when we have met at a restaurant to share a meal.
The moral of the story: when we take the initiative and apply ourselves, we can find fresh ways to connect with others.
A popular senior website asserts that one in three older adults experiences loneliness, while 34 percent of adults between 50 and 80 reported feeling isolated and disconnected from the world around them. Having gone through the deaths of family members and friends over the past few years, I can relate to this. Other factors are lack of family or distance from family, limitations in mobility or transportation challenges, chronic health conditions, and hearing loss or sensory impairments.
Studies reveal more than one million older people report going over a month without speaking to any friend, neighbor, or family member. Research also indicates social isolation can trigger the same brain pathways as physical pain.
In the podcast mentioned above, neuroscientist Ben Rein said pretty much the same thing. God himself said it is not good for man to be alone. Whether you consider yourself an introvert or an extrovert, all of us were created for relationship and we thrive in connection with others, not apart from it. All of us experienced the destructive isolation done to our young and our elderly during the pandemic lockdowns. Many of us pushed back, while others, sadly, succumbed. In too many cases, this resulted in suicide and death.
Let’s not allow that to happen again, to ourselves, or to anyone else.
Faith centers and social clubs can sometimes fill those gaps in connection. I have a 95-year-old friend named John, who thrives through his connection to his Civitan group and through University of North Alabama’s Institute for Learning in Retirement (story linked above). But it doesn’t have to be about adding an activity or joining a club. Everyone has to eat, and many people don’t want to eat alone. Janet Teal Miggin was smart to take the initiative to invite others to eat with her, and it appears to have transformed the lives of the people in the community, as well as given much-needed support to small businesses in the area.
So, why not resolve to find new ways to connect to others this year? You have nothing to lose and so much to gain. It’s not only food for the body and soul, but it could make a difference in your overall health or the health of someone else.
ABC 7 in Los Angeles recently profiled Miggin and the Downey Supper Club.
WATCH:
@abc7la A local woman didn’t want to go to a restaurant by herself, so she came up with an idea to form a #supperclub. The #DowneySupperClub meets once a month and aims to support local businesses and promote #humanconnection. ♬ original sound – ABC7LA
Editor’s Note: At RedState, it’s not all about politics and policy. We like to bring attention to what’s good in the world, with columns like “Feel-Good Friday,” “Start Your Weekend Right,” and “Hoge’s Heroes.”
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